Carol’s Comments

Lessons for Life: Change or die Part 2

In this new column about integrated wellness—body, soul and spirit—Carol will talk about different aspects of health, while encouraging us to live the best life possible

In my last column, we started exploring the idea of change in our personal lives. Businesses fail without keeping up with changes in technology and services, and our personal lives can be ruined if we don’t learn to make the inside-out changes that bring renewed health and vitality to our relationships, our physical health and our work.

We may think we can change our lives by focusing on outward appearance: a buff bod, a brow lift, a new hair color or by changing spouses/significant others, but at the end of the day, or the surgery, or the relationship, we’re still left with our selves.. By creating new positive thought patterns, we change the framework that defines how we see the world, how we speak and how we act: who we are.

The mind is like the rudder that guides a ship, and where your mind goes, your life with follow. So instead of accepting the “I hate myself, I’ll never be successful, I always make mistakes” kinds of thoughts, we insert “I love myself, every day I’m learning how to be better at ___, mistakes are inevitable - but I’m learning, failure leads eventually to success.” And it’s just as important to speak those powerful thoughts out loud to yourself, and to others, as reminders of our potential and to teach others how to treat us.

Remember our pattern for success?: Will→Actions→Results. Will means you’ve defined the areas where change is necessary, made a commitment to live differently, and your rudder (mind) is turning your life towards a new direction.

If you’ve had trouble with this step, maybe you need to hit the pause button. Don’t get ahead of your soul, slow down. If your definition of success is how busy you are, this won’t be easy. But without giving yourself time to reenergize, not only are you more vulnerable to impulsive behavior, but as your emotional energy runs out, so does your willpower. Make a habit of creating breathing space in each day, giving yourself permission to do nothing for at least 10-15 minutes. Stare off into space, take deep cleansing breaths, find quiet and solitude, meditate, pray, and don’t answer your cell phone. Stop doing and just be. As your energy is renewed, you will be able to think more clearly about your life and be able to implement and sustain change. Research has proven that taking small breaks in our day makes us even more productive when we need to be.

Actions follow your thoughts, back up your intentions for your life. Without action, there are only unfulfilled wishes. Anyone can talk about changing, but you’re actually doing something about it! There’s an emotional struggle here, no doubt about it, but with consistent practice you will leave old habits behind and eventually see the Results that you could only visualize before. Seeing something thru to completion will give you courage to persevere in different areas of life, through many tough changes.

Go make it a great day!